My life
What's happened?

Thursday, October 19, 2006

5:40 PM

Haiz recieved another shitty piece of news yesterday, all that effort and patience gone to waste. Sunk cause I should say, well it wasn't exactly painful, sad yes, because it's a looped repeated cycle of what's happened to me lets say....my whole life? I don't know what's wrong...is it me? Haha even if it is, F*** you!!! (: I don't give a shit. Ah well...if it is not meant to be then it is not meant to be. No use forcing stuff, the more you compress something the bigger the explosion. Anyway, as this painful demonstration showed, patience can be a real useless bastard at time, 6 whole F***ing months down the drain, 6 months of waiting, and another guy comes waltzing in and VOILA!!! Haha I blame neither of them though, tis' not their fault, it's just my tough luck. Still fate can be such F***er sometimes. Aphrodite's curse I suppose, but it is also a gift from God, blow after blow that I've recieved has made me stronger, the pain isn't as great anymore, and it is somewhat enjoyable even. Truth to be told i'm somewhat relieved, that kind of commitment may probably have been to taxing for me, judging from her character. I now have the freedom to do what I wish, no matter false fronts, no more having to "tone down", and I can style my hair without worries!! I can also focus on training myself now, for dance, body and mind, putting all that anger, injustice, discontentment, disappointment and sadness to good use. Haha for those of you reading this blog who think well this guy is a loser, he's trying to console himself. Hahahaha F*** you!!! If you don't like reading this blog go watch porn or something. Aaaah much better, all that pent-up emotion has been let out, blogging really is useful!! Haha I shall end off with a shitty quote I came up with. "If life kicks dirt into your face, eat it and get full". Btw if you realised the date is wrong, I actually meant to publish this the day before, but blogger's server was down.